This week has been hectic. So many things have happened. SI (die).
St. John's.
Prefects 2010 / 2011.
Just when I thought I could take everything off and put all this aside,
I lay it all down to take it up again..
This time with bigger and greater responsibility.
Tough?
And just when I was wondering what my week was all about, Jeff put forth the question off service. Service to the LORD. What is my role?
-Still thinking.
I have YOUR strength with me.
Wah, down.
Labels: adolescence, challenges, frustration, God, growing up, help, look up, sustain
kew: " you were very quiet that day. "
zoe: " so.. really? i was thinking mah. "
kew: *grins and smiles* " yalah. you normally talk ALOT mah. "
zoe: " yeah i normally talk alot. cannot think and talk mah. *pauses and gasps* so that means i don't think when i talk. (which means i don think most of the time. since i talk alot) xD "
kew: *LOL*
ah pei li. she thinks i crap alot. uh, which i do. :D
moving on... i have been going to 4 arif for three weeks. or so. and yeah, there's pain. duh. it's obviously not what i would have wanted, not going my way. and that makes me down so much of the time.
but you know what? it's all going away. God has helped. alot. i've learned to be more hardworking. xD ( i actually do homework nowadays.) i've learnt to enjoy nureen and nina more. before they leave. i still talk to hari like the good times.
what worries me is when nina and nureen are gone. i guess i could mix with the girls and all, but it wouldnt be the same. i'd feel unwanted. not-in-the-gang. it's just, they have their stuff to talk about. and like, i'm not part of the gang. hey, obviously, you don't want some girl barging in your privacy just coz her friends left for boarding school right?
not that i don't talk to them now, but it's just not the same anymore. i wish eulene and the form fives were in my form. :(
okay. so for those title readers, you be wondering what it's all about. i've sort of pondered. last year, it was fun, thrilling, full of ups and downs. the time i spent with that somebody, it was satisfying. but i never really questioned myself, what would happen when it all ends?
it's all coming now, and i can feel it. distance. barriers. we don't even talk anymore. it's like he never cared. never cares. HAH. i know, my fault for getting involved. the pain and hurt after the joy. i don't want that anymore. not after another broken relationship. i've experienced enough of those. and yes, being the long-winded me. i've FINALLY come to my conclusion.
6 months.
yup, i can do that for six months. i'm not gonna get my feelings involved. no BGR for that period of time. EASY, no? hahah. at least 6 months is my goal lah. it'll save me from heartache, wasting time and energy and i can concentrate on homework. xD (homework has got to be my favourite thing to do now) :D
now you may say, aiyah. six months only wad, it's not like u get a boy knocking at your door everyday begging you to be his gf right? WRONG. lol. what i mean is not liking anybody, eros way. not even thinking about getting involved. girls spend way too much time on this. at least i did? x]
so that's it. my resolution for the time being. SIX months whole. no lovey-dovey. i doubt i'll live to regret it. =)
i have school tomorrow. :O tuesday floorball training with miss kew. weds maybe floorball training for seniors. and friday, for the juniors. i have syahbandar on wednesdayyy. :( i don't like house practice. hahah.
i love yoghurt. PEACH and MANGO flavour. strawberry is getting too common.
none but Jesus ; brooke fraser.
Labels: adolescence, floorball, funny, growing up, love, school, stuff, unlabelled
it's amazing how much a guy can change because of one girl.
it's shocking how much a person can change in one year.
it's awesome how much a person can be changed because of the knowledge of God.
it's wonderful how much a perosn can change thanks to something seemingly insignificant a friend said.
Changes. people change. alot. from time to time. for the better or for the worse.
Changes like these make you think and wonder and ask questions like, " How?" and " Why?" and " When?"
They get me thinking. having people ask you to change or not to change. it puzzles me sometimes.
Some people just do 180's. like, TOTAL MAKEOVERS. the nice friendly dude you once knew just turned his back on you. as if he never knew you.
the innocent nerd who once didn't make any difference now makes all the difference to you. weird, no?
some people just DO.
Labels: adolescence, change, confused, growing up, people, wondering
